‘Emmy A Break

Last night was the 60th Annual Emmy Awards, or as I call it, “So, You Think You Can Host?”

The ceremony was co-hosted by the 5 nominees in the new category for Best Host of a Reality/Competition Series. It really felt like a reality show, too, because it felt unscripted, uninteresting, and could have greatly benefited from some serious editing.

The winner in that category was Jeff Probst. The losers were everyone watching.

Isn’t emceeing the one talent these clowns are supposed to have?

The only thing that could have been more awkward was if Kathy Griffen had told Don Rickles to “suck it.”

Alec Baldwin won Best Lead Actor in a Comedy Series. His speech was brief, grateful, and modest, and could only have been improved if he called the co-hosts on their home answering machines and called them each a pig.

As they do every year, they had an “In Memoriam” montage, as a tribute to television artists who died since last year. The very last clip was of the opening of this year’s show.

While groundbreaking basic-cable shows like Mad Men and Damages took awards, 12 million people watched, proving that there are still 12 million people who don’t have basic cable to switch to.

The ceremony kicked off with an introduction by Oprah Winfrey, who was great except for one thing. I wish she had recommended a book to go read for the following 3 hours.

The entire debacle proves that television is a place for fantasy and glamour, not Reality.

These jokes may not be brilliant, but at least they were written and presented, which is more than I can say for the entire opening of the Emmys.