“Tool Board”

The Delaware School Board reduced the suspension of first grader who brought a camping tool to school that has a fork, knife, and spoon. Despite officials concerns about weapons in schools, they’re just glad to have 1 student who knows how to use utensils instead of eating with his hands.

Apparently, public outcry over the boy’s initial 45-day suspicion caused the board to reconsider, and even overlook the bottle-opener the six year old might use to uncap beer.

Prior to this, the school board was so concerned about what could be construed as a weapon, they had resorted to dulling all students’ scissors, pencils, and minds.