Scientists in the Antarctic have discovered a new sub-species of Yeti crab which they have nicknamed the Hasselhoff crab, after David Hasselhoff, because it appears to have a hairy chest. Hasselhoff is certainly not, however, the first Baywatch cast member to have crabs.
The crabs are protected by a hard shell that is bulletproof and has both computer intelligence and a turbo boost.
The Hasselhoff crabs also walk sideways, but that’s because they are drunk.
The new species is already topping the pop charts in Germany.
