The
international Cycling Union announced Monday that it would not appeal the
sanctions imposed on Lance Armstrong, who was stripped of all 7 titles in the
Tour de France and barred for life from competing in sanctioned Olympic sports. Adding insult to injury, his former love
Sheryl Crowe has retroactively repealed everything from their relationship,
especially the sex.
The
UCI’s decision came after Armstrong declined to fight the doping charges
against him. No longer an inspiration to
kids, his new message is, “If you fall off a bike, don’t bother getting back
on.”
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