“Caddy Sacked” or "Tiger Strikes"

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/gameon/post/2011/07/tiger-woods-caddie-steve-williams-part-ways/1

Tiger Woods has let his long-time caddy, Steve Williams, go after 13 years.  It seems Woods has been keeping at least a dozen other caddies on the side.

Williams was not happy about the parting, especially after the two just had sex last night.

Tiger ended the relationship, and then got into a golf cart and drove it into a tree.

“Tiger Trying to Get New Stripes”

http://www.usatoday.com/sports/golf/pga/2010-11-18-woods-image_N.htm?csp=hf

Image experts say that Tiger Woods is failing in his attempt to improve his public image, and that people see him as arrogant following his scandal and divorce. “Yeah, it’s true,” Woods admits, “But this bad-boy thing is getting me laid more than ever.”

Professional golf has announced an anti-doping policy, banning steroids and other performance enhancing drugs. Also, no more rocket fuel in the golf carts.

Sure, everyone knows steroids have been a huge problem in golf for years. The worst of it came in the 1982 PGA Tour, when Jack Nicklaus shot a hole in one without using club and then went on a killing spree.

Then there was the U.S. Open, 4 years ago, when Tiger Woods turned his 3 iron into a 9 with his bare hands and then chewed the head of his driver into a putter.

In actuality, there has been evidence of golfers taking performance enhancing drugs. But then again, they may just be cleverly hiding it behind their knickers and white gloves.

The World Golf Foundation, worried that golf may be less exciting without steroid-pumped athletes, has made another rule change that all caddies will be required to be drunk to keep things interesting.