“Knee Cap”

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/ondeadline/post/2010/10/wake-up-call-colo-man-shoots-self-while-sleepwalking/1
On Tuesday, a Colorado man shots himself in the knee while sleepwalking in the middle of the night. The man was arrested as part of a sleeper cell.

The Sandman was then arrested as an accessory.

The man had taken prescription pain medication and then fallen asleep. The his gun was loaded, and needless to say, so was he.

The guy wasn’t too bright. He didn’t think he could shoot his leg because it was a hand gun.

Police say they believe the man’s sleepwalking story, but it isn’t bulletproof.

It just goes to show that if you think it’s safe to keep an unsecured, loaded gun in the house, you must be dreaming.

“Bike-By Shooting”

http://www.ocregister.com/news/england-270533-home-bicycle.html

A man riding past an Orange County home on a bicycle fired 4 gunshots as he passed the house Sunday night. None of the bullets hit anyone, leading police to believe the shooter must have also been texting at the time.

Analysts say that this is a sign of how bad the economy has gotten: even drive-by shooters can’t afford a car.

Police are investigating the incident to see if it is gang-related. Specifically they are checking out biker gangs.

Or, since it was a bicycle, a chain gang.

If he is a gang banger and is selling drugs, that’s how police will catch him. You can hide heroin or coke in your glove compartment, but not in the basket clamped onto your handlebars.

Police hope to catch the suspect and are shifting into high gear.

Maybe the shooter is an environmentalist gang-banger. His gang color is green.