“Shuttered Shuttle Shuttled”

http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/story/2012/09/21/endeavour-soars-over-sacramento-en-route-to-la/57815248/1

The retired Space Shuttle Endeavor landed in Los Angeles today.   It was flown in, strapped to the top of a jumbo jet.  The unusual landing not only impressed spectators, it earned the shuttle the nickname “Romney’s Dog.”

Now that its retired, the shuttle will become an exhibit at the California Science Center, where it will spend it's days talking with other shuttles about the good old days, and telling everyone else to get out of its yard.

“Cardinal Sin” or “When in Rome”

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/45871047/ns/us_news-life/

Assistant bishop Gabino Zavala of the Roman Catholic archdiocese of Los Angeles has resigned over a scandal in which it was revealed that he had a secret family including 2 teenage children.  The Church was shocked, of course, that a Catholic bishop turned out to be straight.

The Los Angeles diocese has a long Roman Catholic tradition of scandal and resigning in disgrace.

Even though he is no longer a member of the priesthood, his kids still call him Father.

Now the bishop is just like most other Los Angeles dads: unemployed.

“Luggage Locked and Loaded” or “Bullet Plane”

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/ondeadline/post/2011/10/tsa-misses-loaded-gun-in-bag-at-lax/1

A loaded handgun fell out of a duffel bag as the bag was being loaded onto a Portland, Oregon-bound flight out of LAX Sunday.  The TSA doesn’t scan or search checked baggage, but they are giving their assurance that future passengers will really be felt up about it.

Guns may be checked, but are not supposed to have ammunition in them.  But just like pilots, every so often, one gets through, loaded.

While this incident was embarrassing for LAX, they made up for it by confiscating hundreds of harmless water bottles.

“Race with the Cops”

http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2011-07-13-rodney-king-dui-arrest_n.htm

Rodney King was arrested on drunk driving charges in Riverside, CA Tuesday.  King had publicly struggled with alcoholism, and despite the help of nightstick-wielding white police officers, has yet to really beat it.

Hoping to avoid arrest on a DUI after he was pulled over for traffic violations, King said, “Can’t we all just get a ticket?”

King’s arrest and booking took place without any incidence of violence.  To celebrate their restraint, the police later went out clubbing.

The last time King had an incident involving being pulled over by Los Angeles police in 1991, it wasn’t funny.  It was a riot.

“Shaq Not Coming Back”

http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/blog/ball_dont_lie/post/Shaquille-O-8217-Neal-announces-retirement-via-?urn=nba-wp4211

Shaquille O’Neal announced via Twitter that he is retiring from basketball after 19 years in the NBA.  Shaq is leaving the game only a few years after his idol: his own body.

Shaq made the Twitter announcement in a video.  It was his first believable performance in a video.

In retirement Shaq won’t completely disappear from the world of basketball.  In fact, he plans to spend much of his time learning how to sink a free-throw.

After an Achilles tendon injury in January, there has been a fear that Shaq could re-injure himself if he did come back next year.  And the only thing more frightening than an aggravated injury is Shaq’s movie acting.