“American Way”

http://bottomline.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/11/29/9088501-american-airlines-files-for-bankruptcy-protection

American Airlines has filed for bankruptcy.  Their debts are so large they can no longer be carried-on.

Due to the company’s financial strains, all of their planes’ passenger cabins will now be even more pressurized.

To offset their costs, pilots will now be paid in frequent flyer miles.

The airline says that their biggest issues are labor and fuel costs.  To save money on both, they are going to cover most of their destinations by strapping their planes to the top of buses.

Employees are taking the news pretty hard.  Their faces looked so sad today, you’d think the luggage they lost was their own.

American’s debt ratio is so high, for the first time, the airline is actually living up to its name.

"TSA Screened"

http://travel.usatoday.com/flights/story/2011-11-16/Congressional-report-calls-TSA-bloated/51246416/1

A new Congressional report calls the TSA “bloated” and “ineffective.”  The report got through to Washington by airplane, completely undetected.

Had the report been a message in a bottle, however, a TSA agent would have forced the carrier to throw the bottle away before boarding.

The House Transportation Committee is troubled over their findings about the TSA.  But they are even more upset about the fact that, from now on, whenever they go through any airport, they can each expect a body cavity search.

“Laser Battles”

http://travel.usatoday.com/flights/story/2011-10-23/Laser-attacks-on-planes-continue-despite-greater-penalties/50885806/1?csp=hf

The FAA reports that laser pointers hitting the cockpits of airplanes in flight are increasing.  Due to the potential danger of temporarily blind a pilot, the FAA is raising the current civil fine of $11,000 up to having a plane crash into you and your laser pointer.

If laser attacks on planes continue to increase, the airlines will start fighting back by imposing laser shield fees on all passengers.