“Non-Pro Posers Throw Blows” or “Emaciated Incarcerated”

In New York, a stampede and near riot broke out late last week among would-be contestants at a cattle call audition for America’s Next Top Model. Interestingly, the story’s inclusion of the words “cattle” and “stampede” has resulted in all the models swearing off all food.

Most models aren’t often involved in such chaos and disorder. Unless, of course, it’s an eating disorder.

Three were arrested and six were injured at the audition. One person was hit with what she thought was a stick, that actually just turned out to be one of the models.

Two of the six injured were taken to the hospital. Several others drove themselves to the hospital, but that was just for more elective plastic surgery.

More people would have been arrested, but there was no way to keep handcuffs on their skinny little wrists.

Sadly, those who were arrested were denied their request to bring a makeup artist for their mug-shots.

Following the incident, Executive Producer and host of America’s Next Top Model Tyra Banks showed genuine concern by encouraging everyone to watch her syndicated daily talk show.

Past contestants were appalled and said the whole incident just made them want to throw up. Which they were planning to do anyway.

No one knows exactly what started the whole melee, but producers expressed their sincere regret that it wasn’t all captured on camera for a highlight reel.