Wednesday, October 29, 2008


After a long vacation, we are back at work here At News Riffs Comedy, scanning the AP wire, tuned into the news networks, and scouring the tabloids for the best possible material to create the high-quality jokes you have come to expect on this 2-or-3 posts-per week blog, Mom (and my dozen other readers).
Thanks for all your continued support.

Well Red

A new psychological study conducted at The University of Rochester found that men perceive women dressed in red to be considerably more attractive and desirable. That’s why Santa married Mrs. Claus, Roger Rabbit fell for Jessica, and John McCain chose Sarah Palin.

It also means that wearing the titular scarlet letter only made the Puritanical Hester Prynne look even hotter.

In another, more accurate study, men were more inclined to look at women wearing nothing.

In a possibly related story, George Hamilton is conducting his own study to see what women think of orange men.

Ain't It Cruel News

A military judge ruled today that threats of death are a form of torture, even if no physical or mental injury is actually inflicted. In a related story, all parents of teenagers are being arrested as torturers.