"Police Chase"

http://news.yahoo.com/handcuffed-man-steals-police-car-radios-key-091608938.html

In Porter County, Indiana, A man arrested for drug charges escaped the arrest scene while handcuffed by stealing the police car.  The suspect came up with the strategy by watching old episodes of The Dukes of Hazzard.

“It’s What’s Under the Uniform that Counts.”

http://www.newser.com/story/123138/police-dept-apologizes-for-revealing-cops-bra-sizes.html

A police department in Indiana has apologized for accidentally revealing the bra sizes of female officers.  Meanwhile, female officers in training are upping their push-ups.

Based on the arrests the female officers have made, their records show impressive busts.

In a related story, their new dress uniforms will be double-breasted.

“Star-Spangled Ban”

http://goshennews.com/local/x1517690264/National-Anthem-muted-again-on-Goshen-College-campus

Goshen College, a small Mennonite school in Indiana, has voted not to play the national anthem before its sporting events.  Critics have accused them of being unpatriotic, but students say the real problem is that they just need a better band.