Tuesday, October 23, 2012


The international Cycling Union announced Monday that it would not appeal the sanctions imposed on Lance Armstrong, who was stripped of all 7 titles in the Tour de France and barred for life from competing in sanctioned Olympic sports.  Adding insult to injury, his former love Sheryl Crowe has retroactively repealed everything from their relationship, especially the sex.

The UCI’s decision came after Armstrong declined to fight the doping charges against him.  No longer an inspiration to kids, his new message is, “If you fall off a bike, don’t bother getting back on.”

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