Air Fair?

American Airlines said today that its new fees for checked bags beginning June 15 will not cause longer lines. Evidence already suggests that they are wrong, as passengers are already developing visible frown lines.

Customers will be charged $15 for their first checked bag, $25 for a second checked bag, and for a third, the airline just takes your bag, keeps it, and kicks you in the groin.

Experts say if you stand up to American Airlines just once, they will stop bothering you and will pick on someone else.



Since the California Supreme Court ruled that denying same-sex marriages is discriminatory, a lot of gay couples are rushing to get married. But Rosie O’Donnell, taking the high road on the controversial issue, says she and girlfriend Kelli Carpenter are not jumping on that bandwagon. She says they’ll wait until they can think of way to do it that will really piss off both Donald Trump and Barbara Walters at the same time.



In two separate stunts today, 2 different men scaled the 52-story New York skyscraper that is home to the NY Times. One hung a banner warning of the dangers of global warming. Neither hung a banner warning of the dangers of scaling a 52-story building.

Both daredevils were arrested. The charge wasn’t published. Could have been loitering. If the one climber left his banner on the wall, it could have been littering. If both men met somewhere in the middle without a permit, they could have got them for unlawful assembly.

Neither climber was injured, but the arrests were justified, seeing how they clearly defied the law of gravity.

One climber, Alain Robert, refers to himself as the “French Spiderman,” but in English, it translates closer to “Stupid French Show-off.”

Newspaper employees didn’t even notice the climbers, despite the fact that, from outside the building, it was easy to see that the New York Times was clearly slanting sharply to the left.

Actually, the Times blogged the stunts, but didn’t report them in the actual paper, because idiots trying to climb a building isn’t news.