“Stripped of their Rights”

California’s Department of Parks and Recreation is forcing San Onofre State Beach goers to cover up, in a departure from a long-standing but unofficial acceptance of nude sunbathing. Park rangers are on the lookout for naked butts in what we’re calling “Operation Crackdown.”

In the past, locals had no complaints about the clothing optional beach, except for the universal rule, “No fat chicks.”

The park superintendent and his staff have been trying to prevent beachgoers from stripping down. However, a group of middle aged men has been conspicuously defying the ban, and that’s when things got really hairy.

The Naturists Action Committee, a nudist group, says that all of their members are willing to stand up for their rights.

Furthermore, they claim to be ready to make a statement of defiance by shedding their clothes at the beach in large numbers. But, as the winter weather comes, they are likely to experience serious shrinkage.