"Tax Tricks"

The German city of Bonn has installed a meter to tax prostitutes for soliciting on its streets.  The money is then collected by the Head Meter Maid.

The fact is, prostitutes can make a lot of money.  So the government decided they wanted to get a piece of that.

At least they are pumping money into the economy.

And watch out, girls.  If you don’t pay the meter, they will ticket your ass.

It’s a porking ticket.

For working girls who don’t pay, the fines aren’t the only thing that can get pretty stiff.

The tax is a flat rate of $8.70 per night, making the city of Bonn the world’s cheapest pimp.

“Pimpin’ Dunuts”

http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2011-08-02-dunkin-donuts-extra-sugar-sex-sting_n.htm

A sting operation in New Jersey led to a Dunkin Donuts employee being arrested for prostitution after multiple occasions where she left with customers in their cars during her late night shifts.  Apparently, she would provide the donuts and they’d provide the crème filling.

Donuts were not what her customers were dunkin’.

At the time of her arrest, she had kind of a glazed look.

Her specialty was simply known as “the donut hole.”

One customer thought he might have caught an STD when one night, he discovered sprinkles on it.

When she was arrested, the place was crawling with cops.  Not because of the sting operation; because it was at a donut shop.

“Sex, Education” or "President Pimp"

http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2011-06-24-University-prostitution-ring_n.htm

A former president of the University of New Mexico was arrested Thursday for helping to run a prostitution ring.  In his defense, he thought it was Mexico, not New Mexico.

Police became suspicious over the sign on his office door, which said, simply, “University head.”

The most popular item his service offered was known as the “under-a-graduate program.”

Or if you wanted to get more kinky, you could pay to be a “slave to your Master’s.”

If you wanted two girls at once, that was known as a “double major.”

Every customer could take an “oral exam.”

(Sorry about the college puns.  The humor is really sophomoric.”

“Going to the Pros” or "AAA to XXX" or "From Prose to Pros"

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/ondeadline/post/2011/03/reporter-says-pay-cut-forced-him-to-set-up-prostitution-ring/1

Kevin Provencher, an award-winning reporter who says a salary cut made him desperate for money pleaded guilty to setting up a prostitution ring in Massachusetts. His customer base must also have been reporters, because whenever they began to perform a sex act with one of his employees, they would call out, “This just in.”

Provencher thinks prostitution should be as accepted in society as an inalienable right, like uncensored journalism. Basically, he believes in Freedom of the Press-on Nails.

E spent his career working as a sport-writer, and he saw the prostitution ring was his way of finally getting in the game.

He says sports-reporting is a lot like prostitution. The most exciting thing you can expect is a close finish.

He monitored his pimping operation in almost the same way he paid attention to the details in sports; by keeping an eye on the balling.

Going from sports writer to pimp was easy. He was already used to watching other people score.

During soccer season, every time one of his girls would open her legs he’d yell, "Goal!"

When covering the PGA tour, every time one of his girls would take a new client, he’s call out,"It's in the hole!"

A sports reporter as a pimp. Said one of his working girls, "After local news and weather, you're coming next."

As a sports writer, he didn't think of himself as a pimp. He thought of himself as a coach. Specifically, a head coach.

He would bring these young girls to sleazy hotel rooms and completely take advantage of them. So he was less like a sports writer and more like an NFL player.

For intimidating a prostitute against testifying, along with the pimping charges, he was sentenced to 2 and a half years in prison, where he’ll take one for the team.