“Arnold: He’ll Be Back”

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/entertainment/post/2011/07/arnold-schwarzenegger-signs-on-to-first-post-split-film-/1

Arnold Schwarzenegger has signed on to appear in his first movie since his term as governor ended and his marriage split was announced, and it’s a Western.  There’s a rumor it’s going to be a Spaghetti Western, about the child he had with his housekeeper. It will be called, Pasta La Vista, Baby.

Some other possible movie titles:

 The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly Affair

A Fistful of Dollars for the Housekeeper

For a Few Dollars More for your Love Child

Once Upon a Time in a Mexican.

Dutch Cassidy and the Secret Kid

or possibly

Tomb-Stone: It’s Not a Tomb-er

Based on his current weight and muscle-toe, however, some movie fans think Arnold should stick to roles like Conan, the Barber.  

“Action/Father Figure”

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20490714,00.html

The identity of the woman with whom Arnold Schwarzenegger had a child was revealed today.  Mildred “Patty” Baena was a housekeeper and assistant in Arnold and Maria’s home for over 20 years.  Apparently, she was really good at cleaning, organizing, and keeping her trap shut.

She wouldn’t do windows, but as a trade-off, she would do Arnie.

Coincidentally, “Mildred Baena” is Spanish for “Baby Mama.”