“Smoking Expense” or "Bank's Robbery"

A New Hampshire man was charged over $23 quadrillion for a debit card purchase of a pack of cigarettes. Now he remembers why he usually buys by the case to save money.

To put that amount in perspective, our entire federal budget is like one cigarette: burned up in one puff by Barack Obama.

$23 quadrillion is an almost unfathomable sum. Donald Trump would eat his wig for that.

Americans were outraged by this story, since they hate to have to do higher math.

A group of smoking advocates volunteered to actually count out the amount, one dollar at a time. Unfortunately, those guys turned out to be avid pot smokers, so good luck.

The next day, Bank of America corrected the error, waived the overdraft fee, and bought the man 65 million cases of Nicarette gum.

For that much money, the man said, each cigarette ought to “inhale” him.

The customer didn’t mind spending the money, but was upset that he only got 20 cigarettes.

He planned to smoke as much as humanly possible in the hopes that the nicotine would keep him awake through the Sotomayor Confirmation Hearings.

The tobacco industry is hoping this story stays alive because its free publicity and for once, they weren’t to blame in the story.

What isn’t likely to stay alive, however, are the tobacco industry’s customers.