“Al-Qaida: Haters”

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/ondeadline/post/2011/05/al-qaeda-confirms-osama-bin-ladens-death-in-internet-statement/1

Al-Qaida has confirmed the death of Osama bin Laden – or are they just lying to protect him?

In their long, eleven-paragraph Internet statement, al-Qaida threatened new attacks on America.  That’s right; eleven paragraphs.  Apparently they are now trying to bore us to death.

As soon as al-Qaida admitted they were angry that bin Laden’s life had been cut short, all of their suicide-bombers-in-training stopped what they were doing and said, “Aha!”

Al-Qaida’s new terror threats were vague, and with one of their main financiers and leader gone, their new attacks may be things like grafitti on billboards, throwing eggs at government buildings, or streaking on college campuses. 

Their chant of “Death to America” being replaced by “You got punk’d, America!”