The Bush administration said today that they have a new plan to fight Afghanistan’s poppy farming, which contributes to much of the world’s illegal drug trade. This will be a blow for poppy production profiteers like the Taliban insurgency, and, of course, the Wicked Witch of the West.
The new strategy has already been embraced by the poppy grower’s arch rival, the sesame seed industry.
One of the main strategies is to get farmers to grow alternative crops, that can’t be made into dangerous drugs like heroin. Crops like… cannabis.
An amateur paleontologist has discovered a dinosaur mass grave site in the small town of Frick, Switzerland. So far, there is no evidence to cause suspicion that the paleontologist had a hand in the dinosaur’s deaths.
The man was scouting a construction site to build a house and discovered Plateosaurus bones. The upside for him is the discovery increases his credibility and respect as a paleontologist. The downside: being haunted by dinosaur ghosts.
The discovery is great news for the village of Frick. In fact, the village is celebrating by changing their town slogan from “What the Frick!” to “Fan-Frick-en-tastic!”
At today’s news conference, President Bush said he was against a 5-cent gasoline tax hike to pay for necessary bridge repairs in Minneapolis and elsewhere. Of course he doesn’t want to the cost of gas to go up now! He’s about to go on a month’s vacation: from Washington, D.C. up to Kennebunkport, ME, to Crawford TX. That’s a lot of miles!
A man was ticketed for posting an “Impeach Bush” sign in a public garden. Hey, if talking negatively about the president is going to get you in trouble with the law, then I am really in for it.
Besides, considering his environmental policies, I think that Bush would approve of anything that disrupts a garden.
The ticket he received was a citation for “advertising on public property.” How is this advertising? What is he selling? Clearly the cop was implying that Bush is for sale, and that ought to earn him a ticket!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment